So, as I write this post, I am sitting in a hospital bed. I am groggy, and in pain. I have just come out of surgery and my future is uncertain. My life, temporarily on hold while more tests are performed….Before being admitted today, my phone was lit up from friends and family wanting to know what they could get me for my upcoming birthday next week. Always one to be helpful, shooting off requests and suggestions came easily, as I contemplated what ideas I had already given to whom. Not that I need anything. Anyone who has seen my house would agree I have far too many things already!
Now though, all of that seems irrelevant. Not because my future may be significantly different to what I had imagined for myself, but because none of the things I had asked for would actually bring me any happiness anyway. Not really. Although the fact that you remembered my birthday and wanted to celebrate it with me did! Post-surgery my phone is buzzing with messages from friends near and far with well wishes and requests for updates on my condition. And that right there folks, is a true gift.
Now, as a Leo, you have probably already thought about how prone to attention we can be, and I am no different! Yes, you are right, we also have a flair for the dramatic in this life!!! Lol Honestly, the chances are that I will recover and be just fine. For the sake of my children I need this to be true. However just the thought that things could have been much much worse for me is too much to bear.
Not because I wouldn’t get the things on my birthday list, but because I am not done yet with the people in my life, and clearly, they are not done with me yet either! It comes as no surprise to me that the things on my birthday list will not bring me happiness. What brings me happiness is not a neat home, or fancy clothes or expensive cars and jewellery. I have always known, ever since I was a young child, that the people in my life were important factors in my happiness.
So much so, that I decided to write this blog about friendships! It has always been my priority, and on days like these, I am reminded why. Love. I know each and every one of my friends knows how much love I hold for her in my heart. That is why they wanted to take the time to spoil me for my birthday and again why they were waiting with baited breath to hear from me again as soon as I was released from the recovery unit. My friends all love and care for me. I matter. Our friendship matters.
I do not need my friends to rally around me offering support and help, but it really is nice that they do it anyway. That these people have invested part of themselves in me, in our friendship, makes me happy to be alive. It motivates me to get better, so I can go about enjoying them again. These people are able to bring a smile to my face, under challenging circumstances, just by letting me know that they were thinking of me.
While I was unable to field the calls and texts myself, I had my husband on duty. He was completely overwhelmed. Inundated with requests and messages from people he doesn’t even know. In his own state of panic and confusion he found the demands for answers too much to handle… but it didn’t surprise him, because he knows how much of myself I give to my friends. He says he does not know how I do it. The answer, I tell him, is simple. I know that the things in life that matter are not things at all. What matters in this life are people. Human connection. Love. And as you all reach out to catch me with your words of love and support and well wishes, I know that whatever happens I have lived well. I have loved. All of you. That much is certain. And I really need some certainty in my life right now. So thank you for your love, care and friendship. You are what matters in this life, and if mine didn’t go on, I’d still have died happier because you were in it. Thank you for your friendship. That is the real and only birthday gift I need! Save it and give it to me again next year, ok?! :)
Your Best Friend ForNever